I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I'm in the dining hall. that same guy is here again, the one who sits alone and talks to his silverware.
Don't leave without me in the morning. I keep scaring everyone cause I'm sleeping in the bathtub.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
How many beers are too many "cause it's Archer Thursday" beers?
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
Weirdest sensation ever: having your penis fall asleep. It was like tiny hulk hogan was choking it out
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
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