Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
I turned off my domesticated goddess switch over 2 years ago and idk how to turn it back on. So in the mean time I'll dodge this gf bullet and eat free steak for as long as possible
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
