It's true. Ladies love me because I'm so strong and they feel safe. Not because of my pseudo charm and their impaired judgement after several drinks...
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
"romantic friends" sounds more classy then friends with benfits
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
