Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
he had to chose between the booze and condoms
what did he choose?
the booze, then looked at me and said, plan b is free right?
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
So I had sex in a bulldozer lastnight now that's definitely a first...
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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