If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
After you threw up you would repeatedly say "napkin" like a siren until somebody got you a fucking napkin.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
But did u die
I found an onion in my purse
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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