Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
'hiiiigh' is saved in my t9 for a reason
The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
i think you may have a shot to cock block in a moment. just saying.
Wake up an cock block please bc these are noises i dont ever want to hear again
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
My plan for the weekend: 1) Get shit faced in Vegas. 2) Not die
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Randomize
