But, I don't have the body of a porn star, so nobody would hire me. Unless they're doing like a trip to the safari and they need an albino rhino
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
Church boner. Awkwardddd
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
I feel that it is my duty to the human race to invent a colon squeegy
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
All right, sex is off the menu for you. Now you just get friendship. So I can spend marginally less time being annoyed by you.
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Randomize
