she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
I just spit my fake tooth out at a customer. I think he thought it was my bubble gum though so it's ok.
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
Oh no I havn't even told you about the naked asians yet
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
It's all fun and games until you throw up hot cheetos in your drawer.
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Driving you two to the party with a keg belted into the back seat has given me a brief glimpse of parenthood. I am now more resolved than ever to never breed, so thanks for that.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
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