Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
drunk pissing on my closed toilet lid is actually quite a sobering experience
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
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