but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
Why can't I find a man that likes bush instead of a vagina that looks like it belongs to a prepubescent child!
Because men are children
Touche
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
I just bought spray paint, a T-shirt, and a box of magnum condoms. The cashier refused to make eye contact! Haha
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
Randomize
