I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
It's like if you got one of your titties chopped off...think of how much one would miss the other...that's how I feel when we're apart. A tit with no twin.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
I texted him 3 days ago he said he was pre gaming for the Super Bowl today he just text" gtomajg kaka hee 48!!!"
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
School starts Thursday. Don't fling yourself out of the car to throw up screaming "classy" before I park this time.
It's a new year.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Nope. Im a prince of the americas. I treat my women like future queens. Also, im drunk watching the royal wedding
Randomize
