do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
My dad wants to dress like mitt Romney tomorrow night and tell trick or treaters they owe him candy.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
Who died my cat blue again?
It was a blast. I was going to say that throwing up in the airport bathroom wasn't classy, but it's classier than quietly puking into a fast food cup while in your seat during takeoff...
Randomize
