Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
You're in the clear; you and Andrew did not joint fingerbang that girl on the dance floor last night.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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