i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
So drunk. Washed my hair un pancheros sink cus I was so hot.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
I want to miss work tomorrow on account of violent projective vomit... Make it happen
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
So uh. Your future in porn. Would you be willing to wear an alien costume for it?
and by running errands I mean eating an entire bag of milanos by myself in the Walmart parking lot
Randomize
