Remember, sex is not sex til both people cross the finish line. Until then, it is just a favor.
There's a girl in front of me with a see through white shirt on and her back says I suck bad dick. Fun night hun?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
You're barking up the wrong lesbian.
I walked into the garage and you were telling the bikes that you were not that drunk.
Headed to the bar now. If I smell faintly of latex and tuna, it's just the new scent I'm trying.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize