But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
Those are some awfully high standards for someone of your weight
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Just pulled back my covers. Jizz. Jizz everywhere. Hipster jizz everywhere on my only set of sheets.
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
I actually have to watch Breaking Bad to make me feel better about my choices last night.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
