we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
genius idea. im gonna paint my penis green like the serpent of sex
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You were in the back of the cop car and told the cop to ask me if I got laid. Youre a dedicated wingman.
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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