She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I woke up and we were making out. So the good news is that after two years off the market, I haven't lost a step. I'm picking up girls in my sleep now.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
