she was drooling, sharted in her sleep, rolled over stuck her hand under the covers pulled it back out, smelled it and moaned and rolled back over. i almost added puke to the disgusting bodily fluid category.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
please hurry. your mom just evil laughed to herself in the kitchen like she's plotting my death.
I intend to get homeless drunk
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
He just texted me saying "you've got a face that suggests you give really good head". Is this a compliment? Do I say thanks?
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
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