i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
I can only send "I want your dick" texts to so many guys before I accidentally over-book myself. I need a day planner.
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
I'm currently sitting beside my brother who is taking a bath and feeding him nachos while he covers his genitals. If that's not sibling bonding then I don't know what is
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
Randomize
