you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
protesters in toronto definately have the best pot
Remember that amazing deer? You peed next to that dear..
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
I was just about to send a concerned text until I opened my door and saw a shopping cart. I'm glad you made it home in one piece and with toys.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
think of it as grooming, as if he is my Kate Middleton and I'm grooming him to be a presentable princess
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I'm too high and old for this...
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Randomize
