ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Where are you on a scale from one to wasted?
Like alphabetically I'd say a v
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
you made out with another girl for some wings
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