So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
