Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
some people spend their whole lives trying to find their soulmate. who knew mine was hiding in utah successfully balancing a pageant career and a coke habit.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
It got quiet and we all stood around and opened the box and I've never seen so many burritos in my life man. it was fucking biblical.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Randomize
