yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
Remember that one time you told the bartender he was fuckable? Well, he's here.
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
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