I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Excuse me but the alley way I wanted to fuck in happens to be a very nice clean area.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Just got arrested in my crocs and rolled up pants with a mr rogers sweater for literally fucking nothing can u come get me?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
Randomize
