fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
It's rum buckets o'clock
One public bathroom does not equal a wedding vow
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
Randomize
