if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just saw a woman parallel park a horse. Awesome. Only in New York..
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
You are the only person I have ever seen offer your other drink to the bouncer on two fors night
Bouncers are people too...giant angry people
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
