I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Zach is always passed out on the floor somewhere.face down in a puddle of his own absurdity
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
Hi I haven't talked to you since you bought legal marijuana-are you still stoned?
My sunday was babysitting three big, drunk, crying Swedes. Unless your day involved four or more giant drunk swedes I don't want to hear about it.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
I just peed on a rich man's lawn fuck yeah America
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
Randomize
