dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I think the universe is against us being together. Or maybe it's just god's way of telling me there is a bigger dick out there for me.
I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
"If it gets you high just do it" I told him he was the Nike of drug abuse
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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