put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
this may be my drink champagne alone in a bbaby pool in the dark night
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
Apparently she saw two women get in a slapping match over a comforter at target yesterday. She said it was awesome. Clearly I take after her.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
All I could think about while he was going down on me was that his moustache reminded me that I want to try something new with my pubic hair.
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
Pretty sure I have a sex related back injury. I'm not sure if I should be proud or ashamed.
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
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