Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
I just saw a douchebag with frosted tips & a LaCoste polo with popped collar driving a Call of Duty edition Jeep. It was a cavalcade of stereotypes.
A black suburban rolled up and a scary suited guy got out the passenger side and opened the door for her as she got in. Then drive off. Who did I just fuck?
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I would fuck him just for his dog
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize