dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
Some rando guy literally just put my shoes on and tied them for me because I'm drunk... Is this what it feels like to be a princess?
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I also tried to hide a bottle of vodka in a build a bear last night so that something that happened in my life
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
Randomize
