I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Of the past 48 hours, 46 of them have been spent naked. I'd say it's been a good two days.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
OKAY THAT'S CREEPY AND I'D PROBABLY ACCIDENTLY ORGASM
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
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