dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
