problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
Please tell me you're not playing strip poker with your cousins again
He compared my blow job skills to finding gold treasure in a gold chest, so there's that.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I got really stoned and got my certification as an ordained minister. How productive has your day been?
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize
