with your own penis?
im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Spilled red wine all over my bed. This has to be the fiftieth time ive refused to fall asleep without a drink in my hand
Playing basket ball at the park with random people that showed up at 1am. the division of teams is based on what drugs people are on
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Randomize
