Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Can't you just imagine you've grudge fucked me so we can get past this?
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
Dude you spoke to a girl about CRICKET. She MUST want sex
just had a woman ask me to donate my eggs so that her baby could look like me. don't know whether to get a restraining order or be flattered. thoughts?
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Randomize
