I forgot to tell you. I'm at a porno shoot today.
i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
he just tried to convince me that tylenol is a gateway drug
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
This is gonna be a long day for my vagina and I
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
Randomize
