ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I just threw up every bad decision and it hurts
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
one of my coworkers asked me if I was PMSing today...... excuse me sir, but it is none of your business as to what my uterus is or is not doing right now. fucker.
and yea, I'm PMSing.
Randomize
