they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
Help. Why am I so naked?
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