I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
Just used the pen i got in my signing ceremony to pack down my bowl. coach would be proud
Guy just walked in with a 40 and a Honda steering wheel. Where the fuck am I?
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Randomize
