her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
My sink just fell out of the wall. I can't deal with this right now
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I have a new philosophy. Fuck wearing bras, it's summertime.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
