Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
I made out with four boys last night, AND EXCUSE ME WHILE I COUNT HOW MANY GIRLS.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Maryland truck stops are full of people with killer mustaches
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
Apparently I climbed into a dryer last night and refused to leave... There are pictures to prove it
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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