Dude ! Why is there vomit with whole pieces of sushi in the shower when the toilet is not more than 2 feet away ? btw you need to chew your food better,
my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Foreign porn with subtitles is a little disappointing.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
She text me that night and asked how the dick was and I quote my drunk self "average at best"
Got a blowjob while watching James Bond's "Octopussy." My 13 year old self would be so proud
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
