I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
just threw up while drinking by myself. This is all your fault. You here = a good night, You not here = alcoholism
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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