First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
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