So drunk, too bad you don't want this
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
It was the best of bangs; it was the worst of bangs.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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