you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
He just told me what he wants for his birthday. "a noise complaint" he also said he wants to be the cause of all the noise but he won't be the one making the noise.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
Basic items
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
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