At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
WAIT this kid is eating yogurt with a fucking ladle. what is happening?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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