I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Im deleting that text because its a possible ncaa violation
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
i swear i was one second from getting his number and then the shrooms kicked in
you made out with another girl for some wings
That's it. I'm moving to LA & sitting on his face.
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
